I Lost My Noggin

This post could be effectively named "Elderese Part III." However I thought this title was much more entertaining.

This is an audio clip of a conversation I had today. The audio clip is actually 3 pieces of the conversation merged together (check out my Mad Mixing Skillz). There is some background robotic noises because I had to filter out some static but trust me it sounds better than it did. I'm not going to transcribe the whole thing so you have to listen to it. Some names have been "wah wah"-ed to protect the innocent. Unfortunately, you know exactly who I am and what I am guilty of by the end of the clip....

Click here to download and you can follow along with the script excerpt below.

The Scene: At my computer having a phone conversation with my good friend (at least I hope she is still my friend after posting this)

Act I: Creating a teaching opportunity (mainly because of convenience and laziness...can't you see I'm on the phone?)
The Elder: I lost my Noggin...I lost it...


Me: I should have put it in your name. I might have...


(aside: don't even try to spam me!)


Me: Alright?
The Elder:
If it doesn't work then come get me, alright?
The Elder: (nods yes and in a flash went from "pity me" to "cool! I've got the password!")
Me: I love you!
The Elder: love you...
Me: Awwww


Me: Well you know, he IS almost 12.


Me: And you need to update your blog, crazy lady (yeah, like I have room to talk on that one...)

Act II: Passage of time

Fades Out
Fades In to the tail end of a part of the conversation where we were trying to figure out who gave whom what virus and when. (Conclusion: our family gave her family the cooties. Whoops!)

Just then, The Elder returns to my office...

The Elder: It doesn't work...


The Elder: What's this one?
Me: Dot
The Elder: No not that. That one.
Me: Let me check


Super-fast passage of time.

I think I cut a minute and a half of silence. At least my friend wasn't talking bad about me to her dog while she was on hold. What a friend! Geesh, she should get the friend-award for just staying on the line for a minute and a half for me to get back in the room!

Act III: The Aftermath

Me: You wouldn't believe what he did...


Me: It did look like an r. (because of my crappy handwriting!)


Me: I don't even know how to blog on that...


Friend: Oh... (surprised with a hint of fear and uneasiness in her voice)

Me: You know what? That's really rude of me. I should tell people that [...]


Friend: Oh, wow... (said as if she was REALLY thinking, "I'm sweating bullets here with anxiety as I contemplate if I'll ever call you again in my entire life...BUT I will appear to be interested and intrigued.")

I have officially incriminated myself. If you got this far without listening to the audio clip, I bet you are wondering what in the world I'm talking about. It's a less-than-6-minute clip. Find Out What Jen Did. (duhn duHn DUHN- to the tune of Dragnet)

To defend my honor, it was a bonus when I purchased something else from the same website. So it isn't like I went out to find it NOR did I pay for it. Thus, easily forgotten. I had originally had it running because a girlfriend of mine was having some issues with a mutual acquaintance who seemed "out of character" and said some rather horrible things to her. Not I-got-my-period kind of snippy, but major accusations which were grossly inaccurate. So obviously I kept it handy in the event that came around to me, which it hasn't yet, but I haven't let my guard down yet. For them it has turned into a kind of "she said, she said" ordeal, and if I do have the displeasure of experiencing that for myself (odds are good), it would be her word against her own word.

3 Responses to "I Lost My Noggin"

inthenet (visit their site)

OK, I just read this whole post without listening to the clip and let me tell you....

I am L-O-S-T LOST!!!! I figured that since we were related, that I might be able to get some of it... but no - nothing - not one bit.

But... I love you anyway!!!!

Jen P (visit their site)

Did you read this?

"If you got this far without listening to the audio clip, I bet you are wondering what in the world I'm talking about. It's a less-than-6-minute clip. Find Out What Jen Did."

inthenet (visit their site)

Of Course I read that, silly! But I WAS at work... and I have 20 ba-zillion people around me that can hear everything that goes on in my cube....
The part where they can actually HEAR me slacking off from work is the part I want to avoid